Bonding Covenant

Good morning married couples,

There is not a week that goes by that some married couple that I am in communication with calls me and has a problem in their marriage. It's sad but it is true.

Marriage is difficult at times. Think about it, we have 2 different people, male and female coming from different backgrounds, often with different habits, likes and concerns. You fall in love and you say the differences are not that much. We will work through them.

Marriages at times are difficult. We can't deny it, or ignore it, because it will affect our lives. If not dealt with properly and quickly there can be some that will not survive the issues.

Let's look at a few questions and try to untangle the issue.

#1- What makes you difficult to live with?

Wow, that's an in-your-face question. The sooner we deal with it and be honest with it, the sooner we can resolve the situation.

We are all different. All have personality traits that differ. NOTHING is wrong with that. If you did not know that before you got married, then what planet were you living on? Being different doesn't mean it is a sin. You are just different.

If those differences bring problems in the marriage, you must deal with them immediately. If there is any form of sin related issues, they must be erased from your lives. Not even a trace must be around.

In my years of counseling as a pastor, a few things must go quickly that destroy the love in marriages that I have had to address to others over and over:

* Drugs not abuse but drugs taken even from time to time.

* Alcohol--deadly killer of any Godly marriage.

* Porn, the most degrading item created by Satan.

* Belittling your spouse with name calling.

Are there more things---YES, but time does not allow me to list them all.

Whatever the difficulties you have are not your problem, it is also your spouse's problem.

So, here is what you do. It is not a complete answer but it is a starting point.

Ask your spouse what you see in me that you think is a problem. (NO RETALIATION) We are being honest and loving to each other to solve some issues.

If you cannot do that, then that lets you know you have other issues!!

We all have weaknesses, that is why we are there for each other.

***If you are struggling to start this conversation with your spouse, give me a call and together we may be able to get this plane off the ground.

I will give you another question next week.

Work on this one for this week.

Blessing to you.